Monday, May 26, 2008

The Ford Farm

What a beautiful weekend! We could not have asked for a better one. The sky is super blue. The blue that stings your eyes because it's so blue as far as the eye can see. There were a few clouds dotting the super blue sky here and there and it was overall gorgeous. The sun was shining and at one point heated up to over 80 degrees.

Jared and I spent most of the weekend working on the Ford Farm or in the house. On Saturday we went to seek out our ever so special hanging baskets for the back. It only took 3 nurseries, 10 questions, 1 temper tantrum (Jared of course) and 5 baskets later, voila! We have the most gorgeous petunias. We also got on basket for the shade that is called a fuchsia.
Our house is becoming a farm and my husband is turning into a farmer. Honestly. Between our orchards: blueberries, raspberries, plums, peaches, cherries, apples, and pears. He's also planted an entire herb garden and tons of vegetables. If you're interested, please, I beg you to come help us pick all this stuff!

We also worked a bit more on the side garden today to clear it out and get it ready for tilling and for Jared to plant grass. There is this big empty area that has just been full of weeds. Now we'll plant some grass until we can afford to do it up like an English garden. Jared has all these high hopes and dreams for it. All I keep thinking is how my garden is making me poor. Every plant or bag of peat moss (aka shit), is one less purse or pair of shoes I can buy. The good thing is our gardens look beautiful. Too bad we have no friends that will come over and enjoy it with us. That's the down side of living in the middle of nowhere. No one wants to drive down to us. And with gas prices on the rise, we can bet it won't be changing any time soon.


Here are our petunias before we gave them a prettier home.


Here are our petunias now! So beautiful!



This is a fuchsia. It's so elegant and gorgeous.



Here is one of vegetable patches and that is lettuce growing.


Here is hard working Jared tilling the ground for some new improved grass to come. He's never to happy with me when I'm taking his picture of him working his butt off in the sun while I'm bouncing around doing nothing but capturing this wonderful moment on film.


The ground almost totally tilled, ready for some soft green grass.



In my previous post I was making fun of Jared and men in particular about their obsession with their lawn. Can you tell my hubby is a perfectionist? It's really gorgeous though. I love it!

The fruit trees are growing. I can't wait to get some goods!



One final edition made this weekend was a hummingbird feeder. We saw them all over last summer so this summer we've decided to feed them. Hopefully they come! I haven't seen one yet. Oh and funny story, that nectar, red stuff in there... yeah I filled it up and of course the klutz that I am, I managed to spill it all over me, the garage bench and floor. It was fun...

Smudge loves to hang out with us when we're outside. She just lounges in the shade as we work. As we move, so does she. It's so cute. Here she is checking out her reflection in the pool. Don't jump!

And here is Sooty. He can't go outside yet so he just sits inside the screen door whining and crying. Poor thing.

Monday, May 19, 2008

No more Vegas now, I mean it!

There are only so many times one can go to Vegas. I would say being there for my (can't even count, it makes me ill) nth time, I've just about had more than my share of the crazy culture that Las Vegas is.

I just got back from 8 days, not a typo, 8 days in Vegas for my event. It amazes me still after all this time the things people see and do in Vegas. It certainly is different. I had an event at the Mirage. The Mirage is awesome. Not because of it's enormous size, the fact that you can get pretty much anything you want to eat or drink whenever you want, the brand new guest rooms they just had redone or the fact that they have the closest elevator walk to the conference center so far. I just like them because they know me now and are great to work with.

This trip I have to write about because it indeed was a gem. So much more than last year. I mean, last year we had playboy bunnies, blue man group and probably my worst event ever (thanks to a certain someone who doesn't deserve to get mentioned...)

But this year, wow, I can't even describe this year's trip to Vegas without laughing out loud. It was crazy and I left the Mirage 3 times in the 8 days I was there.

Here's to my top ten crazy Vegas 2008 moments (in no particular order):

1. We bought a megaphone. The megaphone mixed with Bob Marley - bad idea. I pretty much took control of that sucker for megaphone karaoke. Sorry co-workers!

2. Visiting Planet Hollywood for a tour of their conference center in the event we want to go there next year. Timing our tour perfectly with America's Got Talent auditions going on. Don't think I've ever seen so many drag queens, future star children and their crazy mothers or other random people in the craziest dress.

3. Going down the elevator with a bridesmaid and a newly married groom (who might I add had just left a room together on my floor). Then the bride calling the groom in the elevator wondering where he is. And the bridesmaid giving him a kinky look asking where his bride is...

4. Definitely more tatas than I've ever seen this time around. There was this one woman whose waist was the circumference of one of my thighs and had knockers bigger than watermelons. I was shocked she could stand up at all without breaking in half.

5. Women and heels. Hello! Are you stupid! Just because you are in the gambling capital of the world, dressed like a hoochie momma, it does not mean you need to wear shoes making you tower over everyone you see and at the same time walking down the strip! My feet hurt just looking at you! Put on some freakin' flip flops or sneakers and call it a day...

6. I go to Vegas for work, not for pleasure. But that does not stop the stares I get for looking like a complete scrub. I would have to say, this trip I've never been so looked at and given dirty looks because I was not in my sluttiest outfit with my ass hanging out and painful high heels. I was wearing sweats and a filthy t-shirt. Give me a break people!

7. Do you think people go to Vegas and act differently than they would on normal circumstances? Or do they all go there and act like complete freaks of nature? Everywhere you look people are high on life, alcohol and God knows what else. They romp around like the city is the greatest thing since sliced bread. I mean honestly, if they acted like this in normal life, they'd be put in a mental institution I believe.

8. Free stuff alert! Just because I work with the hotel staff does not mean that I get free stuff. I'd appreciate if people would stop asking me to get them free Love tickets or free tickets to see Danny Ganns. Hello! If I got free stuff, do you honestly think I'd give it to you before using it for me?

9. This one is funny. I don't even need a full sentence but instead just words: Wynn Hotel, Tryst, 2:00 AM, free cigars, free booze, VIP table and treatment. I so don't fit into Vegas...

10. This is my favorite anecdote from Vegas. Probably one of my worst traveling fears came true. Let's paint the picture: I've worked 16 hours on my feet. I have not slept for the past 4 nights in my hotel room. I closed the door to my room and put the deadbolt over. I lay down and at 11:45 PM I'm almost completely passed out and happy as can be for that matter. I hear people outside my door. The walls are so thin. They are putting their key in a door and I hear (cha-ching). Their door unlocks. Wait, it's my door! They try to open the door but the deadbolt is on and they can't. I jump up in bed (where I'm lying in my nightie and with no covers on). My heart is racing a freakin sprint. I yell, "Hello, what are you doing". I hear a man keep trying to force the door open. Hello! there is a dead bolt, it's not going to work!! He finally hears me and yells, "Sorry, they said this room was unoccupied."

So I'm totally freaked out at this point. Someone has keys to my room and almost just came in. Sitting on my bed, frozen with my heart thumping a million beats per second (convinced I was going to have a heart attack). It took me a few minutes to realize I should probably call the front desk. When I told them what happened they were very apologetic and would call me back when they figured out what happened. After 30 minutes of me trying to calm down, they called and said they made a clerical error. A new set of keys were brought to my room and I was able to go back to sleep. Or in my case, sit there in horror thinking it would happen again. Scared the shit right out of me. Holy crap!!

And that is my top ten list.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Home Sweet Home, God Only Knows

I must say that Jared has done something amazing and our lawn has risen from the dead. It is greener than the crayon box greens (all shades). He was pretty frighten at the beginning of spring when it was not too green and the neighbors were showing us up. But now, he did some squirting of something, some spreading of something and a few other things and viola! It's a greener than green.

What is with men and their lawns? Always trying to show each other up. Always trying to get theirs the perfect shade of green, not too light but not too dark. Cutting it to the perfect height so that it's not too high but not too short either. Every morning, before taking your bathroom break, you stand by the window, gaze over it, glance to the neighbor, than back at yours; always wondering whose is better. The funniest part is the mowing. If men have rider mowers, just look at their faces when they are mowing. It is priceless! They are like kids at a candy store (see exhibit A). They always have a huge smile on their face like it's the greatest thing since sliced bread.

Exhibit A


Yesterday, I came home from a long day in the office and drove up my driveway to see Jared smiling away on his big boy mower. As I drove up, I noticed a new edition to our garden. I couldn't help smiling. I got out of the car and Jared came running over as I check it out. He asked me if I liked it. I was staring at this arch sign in the garden with a "Home Sweet Home" sign with a little birdy on it. I was shocked that he had bought this sign. He said that there was a new garden store and it had caught his eye. I couldn't help but laugh at the thought of Jared buying this cutsie sign for our yard. It made me smile, that's for sure. I would never have picked it out but I do like it.



The girls at work got me into the HBO show Big Love. Love the show! It's about this polygamist family in Utah. The sing the beach boys before the show starts too which is even cooler...

Monday, May 05, 2008

Seriously, WTF

I'm so sick and tired of people. They piss me off. Who the hell do they think they are? Did God come down from heaven and suddenly say that they are a Saint and or the son of God and can do what ever the hell the please whenever the hell they want?

  • Did someone take a lance and tap it on each shoulder, knight them and give them the power to do all the evil they could possibly want to do in this world?
  • Did someone give them the power to sit down, pop a squat and flowers bloom from their asses, making them think they are holier then thou?
  • Is there a course you can take, online obviously, called Asshole School, where you can boot up, learn how to perfect the art of being a total ass, you take a quiz in which you are to make a poor soul's life completely miserable to which you pass and with your certificate of achievement can go about wreaking havoc amok wherever you deem necessary?
  • Is there a book at Barnes and Noble (because obviously Border's would never sell it) called: 10 easy steps to make every one's life around you a disaster. You buy it and 10 easy steps later you're on top of the world because everyone else is in a dark hole, committing suicide, being arrested or crying pathetically in their beds, all because of you, the ASS HOLE!
  • Is there a specific town in peaceful Iceland where people are born and raised to be total jerks and they go to school and only learn to be jerks and then they are sent all over the world to teach their jerkiness to the world? Are these people students of these jerks?
I am so sick and tired of people doing whatever they want and not giving a damn how it affects other people. Don't people care about other's anymore? Isn't there anything such as caring, compassion, consideration anymore? Am I the only smuck left that does care? If so this sucks.
My wishes:
  1. I wish the world was a better place. People were genuine and cared about one another, even strangers.
  2. I wish people could sit down and talk things through instead of picking up a gun or a weapon first.
  3. I wish there were things more important to people that would outweigh everything they had and that one thing was not money.
  4. I wish people cared more about the people in their family, their work place, their neighborhood, and their country than about the celebrities they see on TV.
  5. I wish people did not say the don't have time. Time is something you have the most of. It's all about how you choose to spend it.
  6. I wish people didn't have to do things they did not want to do and could spend more of their time doing the things they like to do.
  7. I wish people would think before they act or speak and especially how these actions or words will affect the person on the other end.
  8. I wish people were not selfish. If they could only think about other people before themselves, think about how much better we could all be.
  9. I wish life was simpler. Seems things are so complicated when all we need to do is live, love, laugh and have fun.
  10. I wish people were still reading my blog after all my rants. I fel I have some good words of wisdom even though I hate showers...



Yes, this post totally needed some Rainbow Brite...
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