I have a real itch to write today but have not been able to give myself time to do it. I'm at work all day, blah. Then tonight I'll be out most of the evening picking up furniture, blah. Why do we give ourselves so little time to do the things we love? Why do we let life get in the way?
Dishes need to be done, dishwasher emptied, switch the laundry, pay the bills, make the bed, make meals, put the clothes away, and answer those emails. I didn't sign up for these things but they just are. They need to be done every day. I could get up earlier or go to bed later. I could hire a maid (ha! I wish). I could not care about a dirty, disheveled house (who, me?! yeah right... plus have you met my husband?). I could even just make Jared do it all - but that seems totally unfair.
There is a fine line between what you want to do versus what you have to do. I am the worse at distinguishing the two and making sure I get the best of both worlds. I want my cake and to eat it too (literally, I could totally go for some cake right now...do you know any places that deliver?!). I want to live a simple, carefree life which includes: selling all of my possessions, quitting my job, taking all of my money and moving to Fiji where I will then open up my own little shop or B&B on the beach and raise Fiji babies for the rest of my life with Jared. Okay so this sounds crazy, I know but every once in a while I let myself dream of simple, easy living with barely any possessions and responsibilities - who doesn't for that matter? But I always wake up. No matter how much I long for simpler times and the beaches of Fiji, I could never actually do it. Plus I'm sure there would still be bills to pay, meals to make, laundry to do, etc. I can not escape it!
So I look at my life now and picture what it's going to be like 6 months from now. Can anyone say hecticer? (no you can't because I just made up that word and it's pretty lame...). Our life is going to be crazy in 6 months. Am I ready for it, no. Am I looking forward to it, yes. I need to make sure these next 6 months are spent doing things I really want to do because I'm not sure how much of those things I'll be able to do after baby. So if my house isn't as tidy as usual, I'm going to turn a blind eye (particularly my desk area which looks like a tornado hit it...), if I don't make the bed every day, if I decide to sit in my pajamas on a Sunday and read or watch TV, I will try not to feel guilty about it. Oh and I'll try not to let my busy body husband who is ALWAYS doing things make me feel guilty. He needs to take some lessons on relaxation - it is a problem.
Old habits will be hard to break. But I will try. Or I could just hire some fancy science nerd to invent fast forward motion for doing chores and things you don't enjoy so they go way faster. Cloning is an option as well...