Monday, January 07, 2013

Soundtrack of My Life

I love music.  There are so many songs in my life that take me to a particular place or day; that time in my life I can vividly remember the song that took over that moment.  Some are happy while others are sad.  I always picture myself in the movie of my life with that particular song pumping through the picture.  

I thought of this today. I was in a great mood, so happy and this song (Fallen by Sarah McClauchlan) came on the radio.  The smile was gone and tears were in my eyes as I relived the saddest time in my life.  I was in a deep depression back then and cried all the time.  I would play this song over and over again just cry to it.  It was the soundtrack song to my depression and I can't bear to listen to this beautiful song now without remember those dark days.  Days when I wanted to drive my car into a tree just to get rid of the unhappiness; a coma was better right?  Those were sad, dark days and when I look at my writing from that time period, I can't even read it as it doesn't seem like me at all.

But hearing that song made me think of other songs.  This song (Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson) holds fond memories for me.  When I first started dating Jared, we only saw each other on weekends because we were an hour away from each other.  I would drive down the highway to his house in my VW Cabrio Convertible belting out this song.  It was the soundtrack for my finding the perfect love and moving forward with my adult life.  It was so fitting and I always smile and get a huge sense of pride when I hear it.

Lori and I in the Swiss Alps during the Contiki tour.
This song (Neil Diamond's Sweet Caroline) holds a very dear place in my heart - even though Red Sox fans totally killed it, almost!  When I did my study abroad in London, my flat mate (Lorikins) and I took a Contiki tour of Europe - seriously two weeks of some of the best times of my life!  Each Contiki tour had an official song and every morning that would blast it through the bus.  Sweet Caroline was our song.  So no matter how tired we were, how hungover, or how excited, that song blasted through the bus at 7am. Sometimes it was awesome and other times it was rough with hangovers.  But that song always reminds me of that amazing trip we had and the friendship Lorikins and I still have 10 years later.

Some other soundtrack of my life songs include:

I'm really good at belting tunes out...

Here Comes the Hot Stepper - Dancing on the table at a friends house during an eight grade party.

One Week by BNL - Sitting on a beach in RI junior year of high school and memorizing every single word to the song until me and my friend Allison could literally sing a long.  I still remember all the lyrics!

Brian Wilson by BNL - Going to dozens of BNL concerts, waiting for this song, then jumping around like a mad woman because it's so damn awesome of a song!

Ghetto Superstar - Senior year of high school and every dance jamming out on the dance floor.

Always Be My Baby - Rocking out in the parking lot of high school to this song and doing handstand walk races with my softball team until the bus showed up.

Still the One - In high school, I just assumed this would be my wedding song one day and I'm always reminded of my high school boyfriend I had wanted to marry, stupidly! 

Macarena - Doing the dance in the car as I drove around with friends, yeah real safe!

Pork and Beans - I sang this at the top of my lungs non stop while I was pregnant, the entire time and I am surprised Lyla didn't come out of my womb singing it... (She sings Troublemaker by Weezer instead)

Dancing Queen - Freshman year of high school and making up a dance with this girl Maureen.  (Random, right?!)

This is just a small sampling of my life soundtrack and I'm sure there are loads more.

It's just amazing how listening to a song or even just thinking of it can take me back to an era in my life I'll never forget.  That is the power of music!

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